Tiny O'Toole

A Man Who Needs No Introduction
Murphy The Goat

I have a good friend named Tiny O’Toole
Who is really a moody old chap.
Behaves in a most uncivilized way,
And he spits when I give him a slap.

For reasons unknown to me, Tiny O’Toole
With the women is really a hit.
Though it seems that no matte how hard I try,
I can’t get him to stop with his spit.

He’s always in fights, my friend Tiny O’Toole
Where the odds are 5 against 1.
And while he’s often the loser in fights of this sort,
The participants always have fun.

A night of drinking is common for Tiny O’Toole,
But it makes his reactions quite slow.
And though he’s a gifted and talented man,
His talents often fail to show.

I’m not the only one who knows Tiny O’Toole,
He has two inseparable friends.
And though they go out on the town in a group,
Attention’s paid to Tiny in the end.

Nicknames for this character, Tiny O’Toole
Exist in the world by the score.
And you can hear them uttered wherever you go
By both virgins and dirty old whores.

He answers to all these names, does Tiny O’Toole,
And he answers to all these right quick.
For you see, dames and gentlemen, Tiny O’Toole
Is really no more than my . . .